“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”

- James Clear, Atomic Habits

The Truth About Habits

The little and big choices alike that you make today, whether to go for a walk, pour a glass of wine, skip your meditation, or stretch before bed, are not isolated moments. They’re votes for the person you’re becoming. Each moment is a moment away from a completely different future, each choice is a vote for that future, where will your ballot be cast? For which “you”?

You don’t need to be perfect, that’s impossible anyway. You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight. But SMALL steps make HUGE changes… and you do need to start noticing:

Is this action a vote for the life I want, the life I am stuck and stagnating in, or a life I’m trying to leave behind?

This is honestly what The Replacement Project is really about. Not abstinence for its own sake. Not morality and NEVER shame. It's about POWERFUL CHOICES with deep awareness. Peeling off the layers the world has laid on you to reveal your true nature, and making choices from that place of total clarity.

Fast Forward: Play the Tape

When you’re reaching for that drink, whether it’s wine with dinner, a seltzer or two when the kids fall asleep, a cocktail with friends, or a beer at the game, pause.

Ask:

• Am I choosing this mindfully?
• Have I planned for it, or is this just autopilot?
• If I press fast forward, how will I feel tomorrow?

This is what we call playing the tape forward. It’s a practice borrowed from both recovery coaching and habit-change psychology. It invites you to mentally step into the next 12 or 24 hours and ask:

How does this decision ripple into tomorrow?

For me, if I drink on a Tuesday night, I know I won’t be up at 5:00 for my morning workout.  Or I will be and it will be a SLOG. And that morning workout? For me?  It’s sacred. Literally, my entire family holds me accountable and will stay out of my way so I can get it done. It is my Rx for mental health well-being. It gives me clarity, connection to my body, and time with myself before the day starts and the kids wake up. When I give that up for a glass (or three) of wine, I don’t just lose a workout. I lose a vote for the life I’m building. I am not the person, mom, partner, friend, professor, mentor, HUMAN, I want to be the next day. I’m dull and just not my bright and shiny self, and usually am drowning in self-doubt and shame, too.

So I’ve made a vow: alcohol doesn’t get to steal from my tomorrow. If I choose to have a drink, I choose it with my eyes wide open and have a contingency plan for what the next day will look like (This has not been perfected by me, yet, and may never be, but the seed is planted and MOST of the time this is how I am able to live).

The Holistic Picture: Life or Death… or Both?

There’s a powerful question I come back to again and again. I ask this to my students, my family, my clients, and of course, MYSELF. I remember having a medical resident in one of my classes on “Developing Your Non-Negotiables” at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health, and I shared this as a question to determine alignment with your actions and values. He said it changed his whole perspective on medicine and was going to start sharing this concept with his patients and colleagues. It is powerful, sit with it… here we go:

Is what I’m about to do supporting my LIFE... or my DEATH?

And sometimes? The answer is both.

Let me explain.

A mimosa at brunch with girlfriends every other Sunday, shared laughter, sun on your face, ritual and connection? That might absolutely support your life. If it’s one or two drinks, twice a month, in a joyful setting, with a heart full of love and eyes wide-open, it might even enhance your emotional, social, and spiritual health, despite the physical cost of alcohol.

But if that mimosa becomes weekly, and it turns into four or five, or bleeds into the rest of the weekend, or worse, into your daily routine, the equation shifts. The law of diminishing returns kicks in.

• What once felt connecting and energizing starts to feel draining.
• What once celebrated life starts to blur it.
• And suddenly, your actions are tipping the scale toward depletion, not expansion.

Ayurveda teaches us this principle elegantly: anything taken in excess becomes poison, even the good stuff. I mean, too much of ANYTHING is too much, by virtue of definition.

So no, this isn’t black or white, not at all. This question is a nuanced rainbow on a spectrum laden with values, desire, feelings, and needs… It’s about context, frequency, and cumulative impact.

And that’s where the power of mindful awareness comes in.

The Biopsychosocial-Spiritual View of Drinking

Health isn’t just about liver enzymes, inflammation markers, cancer risk, or calorie counts, though that stuff matters A LOT. It’s about your whole being, your biology, your psychology, your relationships, and your sense of meaning.

That’s why we look at drinking through the biopsychosocial-spiritual model. Here is an example of what that might look like upon further exploration:

• Biological: Alcohol impairs sleep, immunity, gut health, and hormones.
• Psychological: It offers short-term relief, but can fuel anxiety, shame, and avoidance.
• Social: It’s embedded in traditions, relationships, and how we celebrate or grieve.
• Spiritual: It can cut us off from our intuition, or in some settings, feel like communion.

So, ask yourself:

Does this drink support me across most of these domains… or just one? Any? Why or WHY NOT?

You don’t have to make it binary. You just need to stay awake. Be the driver not the passenger of your decision. VOTE for the direction you are heading with a clean windshield.

Ayurveda: Choosing from a Sattvic State

In Ayurveda, the mindset behind your choice is just as important as the choice itself.

The highest quality of consciousness is having a mental state with the quality of Sattva, this is clarity, stillness, peace. (More on the three Ayurvedic qualities of the mind and mind types in future blog entries… for now, the main character is Sattva, we only need to focus on promoting Sattva). When you're in a Sattvic state, you choose what's nourishing, not just what's tempting.

But most of us make decisions from the other two qualities of the mind (side note: when Sattva is strong we have a bridge between these two qualities of the mind and can easily go from Rajas, action, to Tamas, cessation, without getting stuck in one. We all have all three qualities of the mind in different balances, kind of like our Doshas! (See previous blog entry on that). Rajas (overstimulated, rushed) or Tamas (dull, stuck, checked out). That’s when we binge, scroll, pour another drink, or ghost our own goals.

Before you choose, pause. Shift into Sattva:

• Meditate, walk, or breathe outdoors
• Do 5 minutes of yoga or a short gratitude journaling practice
• Call a friend who sees your higher self
• Sit in silence and ask: “What would I choose if I felt truly grounded right now?”

When you choose from that energy, you’re more likely to vote for the life you actually want.

What You Can Do Today

So, what’s your next vote?

Here’s your checklist for empowered choices:

1. Ask: “What kind of person am I voting for with this choice?”
2. Play the tape forward: “How will this feel tomorrow?”
3. Use Ayurveda: Get into a Sattvic state before choosing
4. Ask: “Is this supporting my life, or my death right now? And what’s the context?”
5. Replace daily drinking with something else that honors your values

Try:

• A walk at dusk
• An early morning run or HIIT class
• Herbal tea and a podcast
• Journaling by candlelight
• Art/music creation or appreciation
• Reading something inspiring
• A bath with Epsom salts and lavender
• Stretching, dancing, stargazing

Every single one of these is a vote. A moment of agency. A return to your true path.

My Practice

Personally, I commit to early mornings. My 6 AM workout is non-negotiable. It’s my time, my breath, my rhythm. If I drink the night before, I lose that. I either don’t get to do it until the middle of my morning, stealing away from my time with my kiddos or work, or I do it early and feel awful while doing it. So I choose with that in mind.

And I don’t just lose the reps or whatever if I choose blindly. I lose the feeling… the feeling of being powerful, capable, awake. And instead have the feeling of being upset, anxious, and guilty for letting myself down.

So, when I want a drink, I weigh the cost honestly. I don’t shame myself. But I choose with eyes wide open.

And that’s what I want for you, too!

Final Thoughts

You don’t have to be perfect.
You don’t have to quit forever.
But you do have to show up with honesty.

Is this choice aligned?
Is it moving me toward my values?
Is it a vote for who I want to be tomorrow?

Because your habits cast ballots.
And your ballots build a life.

Swap the habit. Find your power!

Sources

• Clear, J. (2018). Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones. Avery.